prayer.

Something i’ve been wondering since we’ve been praying for Clay: Why do we have to pray before God moves? He’s all-powerful and He loves us, so why doesn’t He just help when we need Him most? And when we pray, how much do we have to pray until God answers our prayers? If He’s listening to us, shouldn’t asking Him once be enough – why must we pray the same prayers over and over?

My buddy Ryland has a baby daughter named Jubilee. Maybe you’ve met her: she’s usually content, she’s easily one of the most beautiful babies around, and she’s not scared of too many things (e.g. she doesn’t shy from my dogs even though they’re bigger than her). Jubilee is one year old this month, so she’s not really talking yet (she speaks in "baby English") but she has been learning to walk. You’ve seen it before, right? As soon as she learns to crawl you can’t keep her in the same place. Always on the move since there’s such a big world to discover. And slowly she’s starting to invent better uses for her legs and feet. She’s learned new techniques for standing up: first crawl over to the coffee table, then grab it, then pull…and…standing! It takes work, but never enough to drain her energy. And for fun, Ryland likes to stand her up just so she can practice standing; he stands behind her as she holds his fingers just so she can practice walking. He knows that soon she’ll muster the courage to put one foot ahead of the other by herself. In time, like all healthy babies, she’ll get so good at standing on her own that she’ll release the fingers she once required to keep her steady, she’ll brave out one foot at a time, and then triumphantly…she’ll fall on her butt. 

"Our Father, Who art in Heaven..."

Somehow we smile just as big at the fall as the actual steps. We smile because the fall shows that she and her dad want the same thing, yet she still needs him to make it happen.

And Jubilee will always need Ryland’s steady hand, no matter which “first steps” she’s taking. As a little girl she’ll need him to tuck her in and call her a Princess so she knows her worth and beauty. At the same time – even on the same days she’s called Princess – she’ll need his discipline and correction to humble her and teach her obedience. When she’s afraid she’ll need his courage so she learns not to quit. When she’s hurt she’ll need his hug to teach her security. When she’s lazy she’ll need his intensity to strengthen her. When she’s curious she’ll need his words so she can grow wise. Her dependence on him doesn’t make her weak, it makes her whole.

It’s a dance they’ll share their whole lives no matter how old she gets, and its purpose is, of course, her Freedom. Ryland doesn’t want to raise a puppet, mindless and manipulated, unable to move without his force. He wants a relationship. He wants a daughter. He wants her dependence to further build her personality. He loves to release his hand to watch her use her first steps to return to him. And this will never change as long as she is his daughter. He wants her Freedom. 

So it is with prayer.

Then again, some status symbols will live forever...

Matthew 18:1-20 begins with the disciples looking to Jesus for status symbols. You know status symbols, right? They’re the things we often use to make us feel more important than someone else, or inferior to someone else, or they help us fit in. They’re what surprise us if we were to see a billionaire in an expensive suit get out of a limo at a 7-11 to buy a Slurpee and Doritos. They’re what keep us joking about rich celebrities while avoiding honest conversations about the thousands of kids in Asia and Africa who die each day from starvation for fear that we might be seen as “boring” or “preachy.” Status symbols help us rank strangers as “better off” or “worse off” than ourselves depending on how we feel about our own status.We use status symbols all the time.

And the disciples used them too; they came to Jesus and asked, “Who is the greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven?” It’s a fair question considering that Jesus had been telling everyone that “the Kingdom is near,” and considering that no kingdom is without its ruling class, and since He recruited them then shouldn’t they get to be the rulers? And if they were going to rule in His Kingdom, they couldn’t all be in charge; there had to be a hierarchy, some way to keep track of status. Right?

Jesus used a status symbol that must have disappointed them. He asked for a little child to stand among them and said, “I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.”

Jesus knew and preached better than anyone else that the reputation and character of a child is directly linked to the child’s father, and vice versa. i imagine He’d heard people say of a wild child, “i wonder who his parents are?!” Or heard it said of a violent man, “i’d hate to be that guy’s son!” But i'm also sure He enjoyed watching the excitement of a boy offer some ragged, pretty artwork to his mom, and her gracious response; or the nobility of a father protecting his daughter from bullies when she came crying to him. In that simplicity, in that dependence, in that Freedom experienced only by children, Jesus said, “Change, and be like that.”

Read the whole passage in Matthew 18:1-20. Notice that it’s only after He teaches them to be like children, but still in response to the disciples’ question about status, that He teaches them of prayer, “If two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven. For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them.” (vv 19-20)

So earlier i asked, “Why do we have to pray before God moves?” 

Because He knows that our only Freedom is to Depend on Him. 

Too good to be true?

If we recognize that our true status is humble like a child’s, then it’s only natural to ask for Him to feed us and thank Him when He does, to crave His wisdom when we don’t know the answer, to invoke His power when an enemy attacks. How good would your child’s words be if, after you taught him to talk, he babbled to everyone else all day but only spoke to you at meals, or maybe a few words before falling asleep? God’s joy is in children who use their words to keep talking to Him, a glad Father who savors each after-school story and humble request. Infrequent prayer – or no prayer at all – is like a spoiled child unwilling to say “Please” and “Thankyou,” yet still expecting a pat on the head and a cookie. Only the son who has gained his father’s character is worthy of his father’s Freedom.

So as we pray for Clay, let's use the Freedom we have in Christ to put ourselves in his shoes, praying as fervently and persistently as if you had Histiocytic Sarcoma. Pray as though he were your son, and the only way you could save his life was to Depend on your Father and ask Him for help. And just as a child can't let something happen to her friend without crying to her mom about it, don’t let a day pass without praying fervently for him to God. 

If it’s your day to call Clay, encourage him with words you’d want to hear in his spot. 

If it’s your day to fast, then let the hunger pains remind you all the more of your purpose in fasting: that you, like Clay, need God to be your Dad.